M7600 The strength of men... @ 15:42 on Friday, December 21, 2012 So the Holiday season is here. I'm supposed to be all cheery. But TV, Media, People... they've all been making my so very angry. So before I spend a week with my super right wing family I'm going to have to blow off some steam. Prepare to be offended. I'm not sure if this is me becoming more grumpy as I get older, or if a lot of people really are just plain good old fashioned stupid. I don't know if the world has always been full of people with retarded unrealistic ideas. But with the political turmoil that's been happening lately, all I can do is think about how angry I am on the inside at all these people and their ass backward "ideas". So today, I'm laying it all out. Tolerance is not on the table today. Today I am angry, and I'm going to tell you who I'm angry at and why I'm angry with you. If you think you fall into any of these classifications. I ask that you bare with me, don't debate me, you can stop talking to me if you want. But I will tolerate you for your other good qualities, which is why you are my friend in the first place. That aside, seriously FUCK YOU. Astrology, Racist people, People who think gays will ruin marriage, People who thank god instead of the trained professionals, People who wear balance bands, People who believe in ghosts, The Westboro Baptist Church, Parents who force religion into their children, NRA (this is new), Militant Atheists, Creationists, Scientology, Homeopathy, Assholes who think smoking is the source of all cancer, People who believe in true love, Back seat troubleshooters (IT stuff), and Straight up bullshitters. Astrology: A lot of small minded people live by what the stars are doing, and believe they are affecting them in some mystical/social way. They read horoscopes religiously, and don't go out on Friday the 13th. I have to thank them for clearing up traffic, but in reality the fact that I'm a Virgo has nothing to do with what kind of person I am. In fact the only thing astrology has to do with anything at all- is what the stars are doing when your parents were having the most productive sex. News Papers will print horoscopes that completely contradict each other. Every horoscope can be renamed randomly and printed and every single one will have some vague relation to your pathetic boring life. They are very intelligently written to apply to everyone. Bottom line, it's all bullshit and if you live by it, you are feeding an economy based on lies. But, go ahead. Enjoy it, let it inspire your day. All I ask is that you don't spew your bullshit empty retardo-scope advise on me. Fuck You. Racist People: Do I have to really explain this one? I mean besides the obvious reason to not be racist, you asshole. If you took the DNA of most of the people around you, you'd be surprised how much skin color means absolutely nothing. Most African American's living in the US today have more Caucasian sourced genes than your closest Caucasian bigot. In fact, if you traced your DNA you'd probably find less DNA traced to Europe than the darkest skinned person you hate. The darkie you've been harassing just happens to have the gene that gives them that skin color. We live in a very diverse interconnected world now, and theirs no room for your intolerance on the most basic of levels. Fuck you. People who think gays will ruin marriage: Who cares if it's natural or not? Why do you even care? You are just a homophobic bigot that will be a negative image of the past in the next century. If you have a problem with it, avoid it. Hell, I'm a little homophobic, but I don't make a big stink about it. You don't have to be vocal about it asshole. If another man wants to marry another man, let them ruin their lives. Sit back and watch them go at each others throats. Seriously, I would love to see Gay Divorce Court. Tell me you wouldn't. What are you? A fag? But seriously, you should be spending more time worrying about the problems you have at home. Like Swamp Racing, and Mall Burning. Go Fuck yourself. People who thank god instead of the trained professionals: This is a big one. Remember that mining accident where the Latino miners were trapped for over 30 days? The name of the mine, and the location escape me at the moment. But engineers and scientists worked their asses off to save their lives. They designed and developed a method of extraction within a month! That's fucking amazing! That's an amazing feat of mans ingenuity and ability. What did the miners do when they came out? They thanked god. They all thanked God for saving their lives. Hello? Engineer over here, can I get some credit? No? Okay. I get paid right? Fuck man. Same situation applies to Paramedics, Surgeons, Police Officers, Fire Fighters, and ever other professionalism out there. Stop giving credit to an invisible man, that doesn't exist in the sky. Give credit where it is due, where reality is. The amazing and impressive efforts of man and mankind. Take pride in knowing you are part of a species out of 5 million others on this planet that can do such amazing feats. If you don't appreciate it then maybe you should stop being a part of it. Fuck You! People who wear balance bands: I don't have much to say about this, other than you are a sad and gullible person. There is zero scientific evidence that supports this arm band, and if you try to give me that bullshit balance test again I'm going to punch you in your balance balls. Anyone with a brain knows how the balance test bullshit works and if I have to explain it to you, you deserve to wear the band of shame. Fucking Idiot. People who believe in Ghosts It's nice to think our deceased loved ones are around in spirit somehow. Sure keep believing in some bullshit that makes you feel good, I have no problem with that. But if you are going to preach to me about how you saw with your own eyes, a dead fucking Indian Man in your hallway, on a cold boring night, you're going to get nothing from me but pity for your small mind. Extraordinary claims, require extraordinary evidence. Never, not once, has a ghost every been recorded, filmed, or detected in anyway. The worst form of evidence in a court room is an eye witness. For good reason. Because people don't remember things correctly. In fact, every time you bring up a memory, you are rewriting that pattern of firing neurons over again. So that shit you remembered from 10 years ago, that Indian in the hallway? That was probably just your grandma scurrying to the toilet moaning in pain from all the breakfast burritos she had that morning. Grow the fuck up asshole, oh and Fuck You! The Westboro Baptist Church I don't have to say anything about these people, other than they have ZERO MORALS. Funeral protesting? Seriously? You need to get a life and get some basic human morals. I mean seriously for god's sake. Read the Bible or something, anything. Protesting a funeral is the worst thing I can think of doing in life EVER. FUCK YOU! Parents who force religion into their children Look, I'm all about freedom of religion. Freedom of religion is what this country was founded on. If you want to be Islamic, fine. If you are Christian, fine. If you are a Buddhist, good for fucking you (No seriously, Buddhism is one of the better ones. It's almost secular.) But if you are going to force your child to be a Christian, or Catholic, or even an Atheist... after they've come to the age of reason. You need to stop and reason with yourself. If you can respect your friends life choices in religion, you can respect your kids. Your kids are people too. You are doing to your children, what North Korea has been doing to their population for decades. I'm not saying cut it out of their lives, I'm not saying don't expose them to it. But once your child reaches the age of reason and curiosity do not kick them out of the house because they decide to be an atheist or choose a different religion. This is the United States of America. We are founded on freedom of Religion. By forcing your children into a life of "insert religion here" you are being unamerican, and immoral. Shame on you. Shame on you and your stupid fascist religion. Fuck You. NRA This is a new one. I used to think they weren't that bad. I really liked Charlton Heston's quote, "blah blah blah something blah... pry it from my cold dead hands." In fact I still use this as a hybrid quote for other random things, like icecream and Facebook. "I'll stop updating my status when you pry Facebook from my cold dead hands.", "I'll stop eating this icecream when you pry it from my cold dead sticky hands." But today, on TV, fucking the NRA, Wayne LaPierre the Chairman, said.... put MORE guns, into schools. That's right. Wayne LaPierre said, in reaction to the Connecticut shootings, put MORE guns into SCHOOLS. So his answer to guns killing children is more guns near children. I'm sorry, I thought Hilter killed himself in Germany. But apparently he works for the NRA today. Look, I like guns. I have no stance on gun control. But putting armed guards near children in school is a VERY BAD IDEA. I don't have as much faith in man as this guy does. People are not perfect. People have bad days. Me for example, I'm not usually this vocal about shit I hate. But I am today. Maybe a very disciplined armed kindergarten school guard with a gun might have a bad day after his 20 years of kindergarten school guard duty service. You never know. Bottom line. Bad idea. We have cops on the street shooting kids, now you want to put them inside the schools? FUCK YOU! Militant Atheists Militant Atheists. Your cause is just, but your methods are really really bad. You think you are going to force people to give up religion by suing places for putting up pictures of Jesus on Christmas, or having the 10 Commandments in front of a court house? That is NOT going to convince people to become an Atheist. All that is going to do is make Christians and Catholics HATE Atheists. I'm an atheists and I'm ashamed at some of the bullshit I see online, and on TV. Atheists are finally just recently getting some positive attention and you are just ruining it. You are part of the problem that started the whole "War on Christmas" bullshit. STOP IT. Just be an Atheist. Be the definition of what the word Atheist means. Non-Thiest. What you all really are, are Religion Hating Asshole - eists. You are no better than the assholes who come to my door that try to shove pamphlets down my throat. Fuck You! Creationists I have a very good friend that is actually a Creationist. I try to avoid debating with him on this subject because I know nothing I say will ever convince him. In fact, these people exist solely because they don't believe in "facts" and "science" and "evidence". Evolution has been proven time and time again across a broad spectrum of different scientific fields. Everything from Paleontology, to Geology, to Astronomy, to Particle Physics. Every field of science confirms that the earth is 4.6 Billion years old, NOT 6000 years old. Don't get me started on the bullshit about Noah's Ark. You are no better than the Dead Indian Ghost fucker. What's worse is the term "Christian Science". The definition of science is to disprove a theory, not to relentlessly try to prove that a book COULD be right. Read a god damn book that was written after 9th century (CE), asshole. Also, good friend, if you are reading this... Fuck You! Scientology I like Sci-fi. Scientology is Sci-Fi gone wrong. I fear of getting sued by Scientology. Because this is the only reason their Church is still around. So instead of speaking out against them, enjoy these educational videos. Scientology, and Tom Cruise. Homeopathy Homeopathy is evil because it is actually killing people. It is morally wrong. The idea of taking a proven medicine, and then diluting it down to 1/1000th of its dose and then taking it thinking it will cure you is so completely retarded that anyone that believes it should die from their illness. Steve Jobs had pancreatic cancer, he knew about it early on. If he used Western medicine, with a couple sessions of chemotherapy and he would have been fine. But no, he tried homeopathic remedies combind with some other bullshit first. Guess what, that dumbass is dead now, and I still refuse to buy his playschool (though impressively reliable) products. Killed by homeopathy. The only thing Homeopathy has proven to do is the placebo affect. Everyone knows that the placebo effect won't cure cancer, but it could relieve that horrible tension headache you've been getting from worrying about not getting enough of that homeopathic medicine you've been obsessing about. "Oh Honey, I have a sure fire way of getting you pregnant! Let's take my sperm, and dilute it down to 1/1000th of it's potency and inseminate you! It's sure to work!" Much like balance bands, and astrology, this is another economy that is based on a complete lie. FUCK YOU! Assholes who think smoking is the source of all cancer Okay, I smoke. I've been trying to quit, because I know it does increase the chance of cancer, but I haven't yet. Shame on me. BUT. To all you assholes out there that THINK smoking will absolutely, positively give you cancer, Fuck You!. It's been proven that genetics, has more to do with your chances of getting cancer than anything else.. other than maybe sitting in a chair made of plutonium or taking a bath in radiated water. You see, the way DNA works is with enzymes. There are your proteins which make up your DNA and then these enzymes that put them together and replicate them. Some people have shitty lazy enzymes, and they can't correct DNA errors as easily as others. So when when that DNA replicates into another cell. Volla! Cancer. That's why some people have cancer at 4 years old, and others don't get cancer till they are well in their twilight years because their enzymes aren't doing their jobs as well as they used to. It's all a big genetic lottery. Now, did I win it? I have no idea. I might have cancer right now and not know. But smoking does have something called carcinogens in them that fuck with DNA and can cause cancer. But guess what, fruit has carcinogens, drinks.. BANANAS have a lot of potassium in them which is probably the most radioactive food out there. That shit can give you cancer if you eat enough of it. Hell right now there are low mass cosmic particles that are going through your body RIGHT NOW that could potentially knock out a piece of DNA and if your little asshole enzymes don't fix it.... well, just don't rely on homeopathy and I think you'll be fine. Now smoking and heart disease? That's a whole other story, and the answer to that is YES. People who believe in true love If you believe there is that one perfect love somewhere out there that will take you away from all your problems... You've been watching too many chick flicks, or reading too many romance novels. There is no such thing as true love. Take it from me, the guy who has been in 6 serious relationships. All of the were good in their own ways, but all of them ended mostly because I wasn't willing to put up with certain things or I was to boring or whatever other bullshit I don't know. Look I don't understand women very well. I don't think most guys do. But what I do know is that there is no one true love. There is the puppy love stage, but then after that is all work buddy. You both have to make compromise after compromise. It's all fun and games until the Oxytocin runs out. Why am I complaining about this? Because there are some very attractive girls on Facebook that do nothing but post meme after meme, or poem after poem of how a man should be to their girl. I see it way too often. Some stereotypical bullshit our society has given us thanks to modern music and romantic television. Louis CK is famous for a reason. He speaks truth. But seriously, when you are in a relationship look at the facts. Consider your options. Take things seriously, and logically. Don't give into that girly bullshit high and mighty jargon women spew around the internet like it's their vaginal Bible. FUCK YOU! .... Ladies. Back seat troubleshooters This is just about work... When you present me a problem. Don't offer a solution and demand I do THAT. Because 90% of the time, its not what you think it is. Now I know how most doctors feel. Jesus Christ, you are a Call Center agent, you sell cable. Your troubleshooting skills include, unplugging a box, plugging it back in, and telling people how to program their remotes. Don't tell me how to do my job, and I won't tell you how to plug/unplug shit. Fucker. Straight up bullshitters Some people are so desperate for attention they'll lie through their teeth in front of your face. Problem is, most of these people are so bad at it, it's offensive. But you can't really call them out on it really, because of the guilt. It's so pathetic, you really can't bring yourself to tear down an already broken man. 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